It's Daylight Savings. I hope you didn't forget to set your clocks ahead one hour. I'll bet some of you did. You can do it now if you want to. I'll wait.
Are you back? No? You must have a lot of clocks.
There we go. I'm glad you're done because I have a lot to talk about. I had a very surprising week!
Drew Carey and I brought over the Punch a Bunch game from "The Price Is Right" and had an audience member play. I love Punch a Bunch, although I play it differently. I just drink a bunch of rum punch.
Speaking of games, we played a new version of Know or Go this week. Here's what happened to my writer Lauren when we tested the game in rehearsal. She had so much, I surprised her by letting her stand up there during the show.
Even I was surprised this week -- by the results show on "American Idol." And, I think everyone was surprised to find out what Simon is looking at during the show.
We're gonna have even more surprises next week. Pamela Anderson will be here. If her past visits are any indication, anything can happen.
Also, from the show "The Good Wife," Julianna Margulies is gonna be on the show -- it's her first time here. And I've invited two of last week's "Idol" castoffs to stop by; Lilly Scott and Alex Lambert. We're also gonna be celebrating St. Patrick's Day. So remember to wear green so you don't get pinched. Unless you do want to get pinched. I'm not gonna judge ya.
Enjoy the rest of your weekend!
This week's guests
Monday, March 15
Ellen wanted to have some of the sexiest stars on the show -- and there’s no one better than her good friend, DEMI MOORE! Demi and Ashton Kutcher are well-known for being a romantic couple; they said they even bought guns together. Ellen and Demi were once in a movie together, but they cut Ellen’s scene -- maybe Demi can have it inserted in her new movie, “Happy Tears.” Then, in the past year, everyone has noticed the gorgeous CHANNING TATUM in some of the biggest movies. The model-turned-actor is now stealing hearts in the new movie, “Dear John,” and might end up stealing your heart too! Also, there’s no better musician for this time of year than MICHAEL BUBLÉ. The two-time Grammy-winning artist is here to sing his hit song, “Haven’t Met You Yet.”
Tuesday, March 16
When Ellen finally captured George Clooney last year, she had one important question: “How do I get JULIANNA MARGULIES”? His advice must have worked -- she’s here for the first time today! This won’t be her first time in the studio though -- the stage where Ellen tapes the show used to be sets for “ER.” Now Julianna is on the hit show “Good Wife,” for which she won a Golden Globe Award! Then, everybody in the UK is paying attention to the new group LA ROUX -- and you will too when you see them perform! They’re coming all the way to L.A. to sing their hit song, “Bulletproof.” Also, JAMES GALEA is often called the best magician in Australia, but he’s going to try being the best magician in the USA when he’s here today. He has some amazing tricks that will blow you away! And Ellen was shocked when LILLY SCOTT was voted off “American Idol” last week. It’s a good thing Ellen has a talk show -- she’s invited Lilly to perform here today.
Wednesday, March 17
Erin go bragh! It’s St. Patrick’s Day, and judging from this show, Ellen’s got the luck o’ the Irish! And the Guinness. One of Ellen’s favorite shows this season is “Modern Family,” and today TY BURRELL is dropping by to share the fun with Ellen. He and his wife don’t have any kids yet, but Ellen hears they want to -- and she’s going to find out if it’s true! Also, Ellen loves introducing you to new music from all over the world. Today she welcomes a band from the UK called ONE ESKIMO -- you just might find your new favorite band. And with the economy as it is, you can always use great advice from MARIA BARTIROMO. She’ll be here to chat with Ellen and will be answering your questions -- so don’t miss out, especially if you find that pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. Or just want to save for retirement. Also, the luck may have run out for ALEX LAMBERT when he was voted off “American Idol” last week, but Ellen wanted him here today -- so he’s stopping by to chat and perform.
Thursday, March 18
The producers of “Dancing with the Stars” have to be prepared for anything -- PAMELA ANDERSON is competing this season! Ellen can never predict what she’ll do here; one time she flipped over the couch and another time she stripped down to a bikini! We’ll find out what she’ll do today when she visits with her dance partner, DAMIAN WHITEWOOD. Then, Ellen will welcome CHEF JOSÉ ANDRÉS to teach everyone a brand new recipe. His restaurant in L.A. was awarded a rare four stars by the L.A. Times -- so the food is bound to be amazing! Also here for the first time is the very cute jazz musician JAMIE CULLUM. He’ll be putting an unbelievable new twist on a popular hit when he sings “Don’t Stop the Music” -- you don’t want to miss it! And Ellen will feature another group of audience members with amazing hidden talents you have to see to believe!
Friday, March 19
‘AMERICAN IDOL’ CASTOFF